Thursday, August 2, 2012

Character Interview: Lord Branin of Dragon Destiny

Greetings everyone, I am Burst Books author, Helen Henderson. Linda has graciously offered to let me post my interview with Lord Branin of the dragshi. Branin's tale is told in the newly-released fantasy novel from Burst Books, Dragon Destiny.

An amber dragon playfully soaring above signals the arrival of my guest. Wind from its wings ripple my hair and send up whirls of dust. A silvery voice that could only have come from the great creature echoed in my head. But the words were not intended for me, but another?

Friend Branin, let me talk.

A moment later the dragon landed and flipped his wings along his back. I am Llewlyn. My soul twin Branin will join us shortly, until then if you don’t mind, I’ll visit with you.

Sitting on a rock and pulling pad and pencil from a valise, I swallowed hard. Honored old one Llewlyn, welcome. I’ve never interviewed a dragon before. What should I know?


When some humans are born, more than one soul comes to life. The human, which are called dragshi, have a twinned dragon soul. When the dragon awakens, so does both the human and dragon magic. When I awoke many years ago, Branin acquired the ability of flight. Like the other dragshi, we share one body in space in time and are able to change forms with the other at will. Although the dragon halves don’t interfere in the human world, today I wanted to stretch my wings. So here I am.


It must be great fun to soar amidst the clouds.
It is. Llewlyn’s deep-throated laugh showed a sense of humor. Then his tone took on a somber note. I have learned much from my human soul brother. With ability comes responsibility. The dragshi protect the innocent--man, woman, and child.

Llewlyn, I’ve heard you and Lord Branin are on search. May I know what for?

The mental contact vibrated with tension and a sense of desperation. Branin and I are the last of our kind. We have waited over three hundred years for our mates, but there have been no signs of another dragshi’s birth, let alone that of a female. Branin and I are alone. The true human women whose paths have crossed ours do little to lighten my soul brother’s loneliness. Although the women understood a dragshi can never truly love one of their kind, that we wait for a human female whose soul is twinned to my mate, there is one who refuses to accept the truth. Black eyes glared at me. Lady Broch of Ky’Port means to become Branin’s handfasted mate--with or without his willing cooperation. A low growl came from deep in his the dragon’s throat. I don’t like her.

My reporter instincts leaped onto what the dragon left unspoken. Before I could summon the courage to pursue the question, Llewlyn looked skyward and when he returned his attention to me, the dark sadness seemed to deepen. Soon Branin and I must return to the confining walls of Cloud Eyrie. Thank you for the diversion and if you hear of a girl named Anastasia who can talk to dragons, please let one of the dragshi or a member of the Ceoltier Guild know.

Be assured, honored old one. I will do as you ask.

The dragon disappeared in a white mist. The dark hair and gray eyes of the man who walked out of the concealment fog meant one thing--Lord Branin had returned to his own form.

Greetings Helen. I’m glad the weather broke today so we could take a turn outside. Thank you for humoring Llewlyn. He doesn’t get out much these days, what with the winter winds trapping everyone inside sturdy stone walls. Soon I will escort Crisiant, one of the true dragons, on a long journey. I’m sure she and Llewlyn will have much to talk about.

Branin took a seat on an adjoining rock. Whether it was a lingering after effect of the transformation or Branin himself, but his mere presence overwhelmed. Anger flickered across his face as he glanced at the sky. I’ m sorry to have to cut this short, but I see the ranks of clouds are closing. There is time for one more question.

Lord Branin, Llewlyn said to watch for a girl named Anastasia. Who is she?


A hint of sadness flickered in his eyes. I don’t know.

A white mist surrounded Branin and when it dissipated, the amber wings of Llewlyn’s dragon form towered over me. There seemed but one way to end the interview and I bowed my head. Thank you for the honor of the visit.

It is our pleasure, came back the silvery tone as I covered my eyes against the shower of dust that accompanied the dragon’s takeoff. And the final message sent my heart soaring on dragon wings. Hatchling’s Curse will be told, May 2013.

More of the tale of Lord Branin Llewlyn is told in Dragon Destiny available from Burst Books. Ebook also available at Amazon / OmniLit / DriveThru Fiction with expanded distribution to paperback other ebook platforms later in 2012.

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About Helen Henderson: A published author, feature-story writer and correspondent, Henderson has also written fiction as long as she could remember. Her heritage reflects the contrasts of her Gemini sign and shows in her writing which crosses genres from historical adventures and westerns to science fiction and fantasy. Henderson's other 2012 release is Windmaster Legacy, the second book in the Windmaster series. A western written under the pen name of her ancestress, Jessie Treon, was released November 2011 in the Dreamspell Goddess Anthology.

Join her on journeys through the stars, back to the past, or among fantasy worlds of the imagination. The trip begins at her website, helenhenderson-author.webs.com or blog.

**********************

An Excerpt from Dragon Destiny now available from Burst Books

            Branin screamed his frustration to the sky. Liam and Dealan had found each other within weeks of their first shift into dragon form. According to the ancient records in the back recesses of Cloud Eyrie, he and Llewlyn had already waited longer for their mates than any other dragshi had ever done. Llewlyn woke more frequently from the shadowed corner of Branin’s mind where he slept and the dragon’s discontent echoed Branin’s own. They were alone and, Branin feared, destined to remain that way forever. Again, he yelled to the winds. However, what echoed back from the ice-covered peaks sounded more like a moan than a dragon’s trumpeting call.
            A hint of emotion whispered at the edge of his senses. He could tell the feeling did not come from his fellow dragshi, or, from one of the old dragons. That left only a true human.
            The depth of the other’s longing called to him. His own hunger answered. Reaching out with a gentle mental summons, he asked, “Who are you?”
            Surprise and astonishment replaced the dark despair Branin first felt from the unknown person.
            “Do not be afraid,” Branin encouraged. “Tell me your name.”
            No matter how hard he listened, no response answered his question, although Branin detected the low rumble of thought. He curbed his normal instinct to charge forward. Instead, he flew tight circles between the steep cliffs and waited. Three loops turned into four, which stretched into ten. Wet flakes from the approaching storm pelted him. A strong downdraft caught his wings and dropped him several hundred feet. Retreating before the black clouds, he tried one last time.
            “Mine is Branin. Your loneliness touched me. Please, what is your name?”
            The contact snapped. In the final moment of its existence, a single word whispered into Branin’s mind. “Anastasia.”
.
Dragon Destiny available from Burst Books. Ebook also available at Amazon / OmniLit / DriveThru Fiction with expanded distribution to paperback other ebook platforms later in 2012.

Saturday, July 28, 2012

Free Read Friday




The Promise Tree  -   Chapter One 

            “I told you, I’m not interested in the job. I’m sorry, but you’ll have to find someone else.” Wynn Colton hung up the outdated beige wall-mounted phone and poured a cup of coffee. He opened the back door, stood on the porch of the old farmhouse and stared at the willow tree hanging low near the creek in the distance. Steam plumed from the coffee mug as he lifted it to his mouth, clouding his view.
            Inside, the phone jangled again. Wynn took a sip of the hot drink and set the mug on the warped windowsill. He strode down the steps and through the field. When he reached the willow tree, he split the veil of hanging branches with the back of his hand and stepped inside the blue green cave. It rained the previous night, and the swollen creek gurgled along its banks. Shards of sunshine cut through the leaves, dancing around Wynn’s feet.
            His eyes followed the trunk to the base of a low branch. A wooden box hung at an angle, one supporting nail loosened by time and the elements. Wynn reached up and flipped open the lid, remembering the day he had constructed the receptacle. He undid the plastic bag inside and removed a few strips of paper, discolored by time and wrinkled from moisture. The ink had faded, but he knew by heart the messages they bore.
            Opening the first one, he read: I wish I could go to Vermont with the ski club. I promise I’ll do my chores from now on. A smile tugged at his mouth. It seemed so simple once. Make a wish and make a promise—and your wish would come true. They didn’t all come true, and even then he knew they wouldn’t. Now he understood that wishes rarely came true, and promises could not always be kept.
            He unfolded another yellowed slip of paper. I wish my breasts would start to grow. I promise not to let a boy touch them, not even Wynn, until I’m married.
            A laugh rumbled deep inside him as he recalled the day Trudi McNeil wrote this and then flushed bright red when he jerked it from her hand to read it. Suddenly, he was twelve years old again and towering over a petite, barefoot Trudi. Her eyes flashed in anger, like dark blue storm clouds, as she jumped to retrieve the note from his fingers. From that day on, he would catch himself covertly staring at Trudi’s chest, measuring her progress.
            He stuffed the papers back into the plastic and secured the box lid. Trudi. The memory made him smile. He hadn’t seen her in, what, six or seven years now? Her daughters must be grown and on their own. His fingers examined the rough tree bark. The promise tree. He and Trudi had given the tree its name the day Trudi caught Wynn sitting beneath its branches and smoking a stolen cigarette. He was ten years old, she was nine. He made her promise not to tell. She laughed and teased, asking, “What will you give me if I don’t tell?”
            He pulled a smooth stone, speckled with glittering bits of coal like black diamonds, from his pocket and held it out to her. He considered the stone to be his lucky charm. Trudi lifted it from his open palm and smiled, tore a piece of paper from the diary she carried and scrawled a note, handing it to him: I wish Wynn wouldn’t smoke. I promise not to tell if he promises to quit. She took the paper, folded it into quarters, and stuffed it into a small niche in the tree trunk. And the promise tree was born.
            Wynn made the box later that week in his father’s workshop and, together, he and Trudi nailed it into place using long roofing nails. It had been Trudi’s idea to line it with a plastic bag to protect their promises. That was Trudi—protective.
            He let his fingers rest on the box for a moment before turning and heading back toward the house. A jeep sat in the drive, and Mayor Tom Gallagher occupied the cane rocker on the porch, his fingers playing on the brim of a felt Stetson hat.
            “Tom. What brings you out here with your hat in your hand?” Wynn stopped and closed his eyes. “Let me guess. You’ve been sent to convince me to run the hospital.”
            “You always were so damned smart, Wynn. That’s why you got out of this shithole town and the rest of us are still here.”
            Wynn sat on the top step and leaned back against a support post. “But I wasn’t smart enough to stay away, was I?”
            “Maybe you’re back here for a reason, some greater plan. Ever think of that?”
            Wynn grinned. “When did you become a philosopher? I’m only here to handle the sale of this house for my dad.”
            Tom leaned forward, resting his forearms on his thighs, his ample abdomen providing an obstacle to the move. “We need you, Wynn. The hospital’s hanging on by a thread. We’ve had four doctors in five years. They all get better offers, or find a greener pasture somewhere else. You’re one of us. This is your home.”
            Wynn rose and stepped up onto the porch, opening the screen door. “You want a beer or a glass of tea?”
            “No, thanks. I have a town council meeting in twenty minutes. What I need is for you to say you’ll give us at least a year at the hospital, see if you can turn things around.”
            “I’m a doctor, not a miracle worker.”
            The mayor nodded. “I’ve done my homework. The internet doesn’t keep secrets. You’re a well-respected surgeon in the medical community. With you in charge, we could attract other talent, maybe get some funding to keep the hospital running.”
            Shaking his head, Wynn laughed. “I’m not nearly as famous outside of this town as you and a lot of other people seem to think. I can’t help you, Tom. I’m not staying here long.”
            Tom took his time standing and descending the rickety wooden steps. He gazed across the field dotted by wildflowers to the brightly painted McNeil house. “You ever hear from Trudi?”
            “Nope. Why should I?”
            Tom shrugged. “Just wondered. There was a time you two were quite an item. Surprised everyone when you each married other people.”
            “Ancient history. We were kids.” Wynn’s glance swept to the white clapboard house, settling back on his old high school classmate. “Are we done here? I have a leaky sink to repair. Got to get this place ready to sell.”
            “You know where to find me if you change your mind.” Tom waddled more than walked to the jeep and hefted his body inside. He waved and backed the vehicle from the driveway.       
            Wynn’s gaze drifted back to the McNeil house once more. He should at least stop by and pay a courtesy visit to Mrs. McNeil. He’d heard she was in ill health since her husband died last year. He took in a deep breath and returned to the kitchen to face the dripping pipe beneath the timeworn aluminum sink.
            He was used to working with his hands, but in a much more delicate manner in which his movements dictated life or death. Tightening the pipe wrench, he gave a hard twist and the pipe gave way. Water splattered onto his face, leaving him sputtering. “Dammit.” He lifted his head and connected with the pipe. Pain shot across his forehead. “Shit!” He slid his body out of the narrow space and felt his wounded head, but his fingers came away clean. He hadn’t broken the skin. He would have a goose egg.
            When he was a teenager, he’d been too busy with football to learn basic household repair skills from his father. He felt so damned helpless as he peered back under the sink at the separated pipe. He had two choices—buy a ‘how to’ book and figure it out for himself, or call in a professional. How many times had he reminded his patients that he was the professional who could best determine their medical needs? And what was he trying to prove, anyway, by undertaking the repairs to get the old farmhouse ready for sale? Swallowing his pride and taking his own advice, he crossed the kitchen and picked up the phone book.
            He dialed the number for the first listing—A-1 Plumbing. Someone would be there the following morning, he was told. He was instructed not to run water in that sink in the meantime. Wynn looked at the phone with disgust. “I figured that much out myself.”
            He hung up, feeling badly about taking his frustration out on the plumber. He should save his frustrations at least until he got the bill.
            Wynn opened the back door and stepped out onto the stoop. He drew in a lungful of fresh air and relished in the quiet. In the weeks since he returned to his family home, he found it a challenge to adjust to the stillness. Not that he missed the sounds of traffic, honking horns, shouting motorists, and the smell of buses belching diesel. But the absolute stillness unsettled him. Perhaps because he had nothing to drown out his memories, or to give him the false perception that he was not alone.
            It was ludicrous for him to even consider returning to Paxton Corners permanently. He’d worked hard to get to where he was—Chief of Surgery at the University of Pittsburgh Medical Center. He was forty-eight years old and realized his life’s dream. That should count for something. It should. He waited, but the emptiness inside matched the stillness around him. The realization that he had nothing to look forward to sent a chill through his six-foot frame and he shuddered.
            He stepped into the afternoon sun and headed toward the creek. If he didn’t move, he might freeze on the spot like Lot’s wife turned to a pillar of salt. As he walked through the tall grass, he worked at convincing himself these feelings were nothing more than normal grief over preparing his family homestead for sale. He endured too much change, too many losses these past few years. Once the dust settled again and he was back in Pittsburgh, he would be fine. That’s what he told himself. But he had taken enough courses in psychology to recognize bullshit when it hit him in the face.

# # #

To read more about Wynn and to meet Trudi when they are reunited thirty years after they went their separate ways, get your copy of The Promise Tree at Wings ePress, Amazon.com, or B&N.com

Friday, July 27, 2012

Coming Attractions



I've set up a blog schedule through December and I have some exciting authors and excerpts coming your way.

Beginning Friday, August 3 and running monthly will be the Character Interview where an author's favorite character will be featured in an in-depth interview. Characters engage us in their stories, so be sure to stop by and meet some engaging characters and the authors who brought them to life.

Friday, August 17, I will continue to feature other authors in my Author Spotlight blog, so check in monthly to meet some new authors and add to your favorite author and to-be-read list.

I'll also be offering Free Read Fridays beginning August 10 when I'll post the first chapter of one of my books as a free read. Enjoy the first chapter and get to meet one of my own (hopefully) engaging characters. (Then go and buy the book!)

Of course, that leaves at least one vacant Friday a month and you'll just have to visit to see what's happening that day. It could be a book review, a special announcement, a contest... Who knows?

You can join this blog (check column to right) and stay informed of what's happening. Be sure to tell your friends.

If you're an author and want to participate in the Author Spotlight or Character Interview in 2013, just shoot me an email.

Linda

Thursday, July 12, 2012


This month I'm pleased to feature a writing duo in the Spotlight. Please welcome the writing team of Cathy Coburn and Duaine Neill.



1. Please tell us a little about yourselves.

C: I came from the small town of Lakeside, on the outskirts of San Diego, CA. I now reside in Phoenix, AZ. Though I love the desert, I miss the ocean, I miss everything about it. I love just looking out to sea, mostly from the balcony of a cruise ship. I love scuba diving, or just sitting in the sand. So why do I live in Arizona? Now . . . I’m not sure, I’ll have to get back to you on that.

D: I too grew up in San Diego. My wife and I both grew up at the beach and our love for it almost always takes us on vacation to the beach. We live in Phoenix, AZ now along with our boy and another to come at the end of this year.

2. Every author I’ve met has their own unique story of how they found their way into writing. What path led you to become a writing team?

C: Somehow I think I was always meant to write, although I was detoured into the direction of wildlife artist, I was never really fulfilled. I was painting pictures I saw, not creating something from my own imagination. In writing fiction, you make up whopping big lies and try to convince others that it happened just that way. Then teaming with my son who is a gifted liar, well that just made since.

D: Not sure why my Mom keeps calling me a liar! I am just a really good story teller. I do like to make up stories and tell them to people as if they were real, (mostly her). My gift of story telling and my vivid dreams are why I started writing. We have always work together on projects in the past, and she has a crazy imagination like mine, so it only made sense to bring both of our creative minds together to write some great books.

C: At least I referred to you a gifted liar this time and not just a whopping big liar as before. But really Duaine, you answered your own question and I quote, “I do like to make up stories and tell them to people as if they were real, (mostly her)” I rest my case.

3. What are the advantages and the challenges of writing as a team?

C: The advantages are vast. First would be less of a chance for writers block. Another would be to feed off each others enthusiasm. Finding the time to get together to write in a world that doesn’t slow down, is the biggest challenge. We would both like to be able to someday do just our writing, as we both love it so much.

D: The advantage of writing together is that we both have our own view of every part of every story, sometime 2 totally different story line or sometime similar, so you pick the best one for that part of the story and run with it to make a better story. The challenge is just like she said finding time to write together.
4. What aspect of the writing process do you enjoy the most? What part of the process do you dread?

C: I love when I’m completely lost in a story, when my characters take on their own personalities and I start to look at them as invisible friends. I both dread and love the editing process. Although it’s tedious I love the development of making my writing flow. Maybe if I just did it right the first time it would be less tedious. But as the writer I tend to read what I think I wrote instead of what I’ve really written. So it takes a fresh pair of eyes to see the mistakes. Thank goodness for editors.

D: I am a big movie buff. So I enjoy writing the story and seeing where it is going to end up, it’s like a movie playing in my head. The most dreadful part is the long drawn out process of getting it published and on the market.

5. Are you a plotter or a pantser in terms of your writing style? Or, do you each have a different style (which would make things very interesting).

C: That’s a tough question. Are normal people usually one or the other? I find that I am equally both. I write by the seat of my pants, going in what ever direction my brain takes me in, then I plot to be sure it all makes sense.

D: We are both not really normal when it comes to story telling "or life lol." I think we both plot out a basic story line, but always if something better comes to mind make the changes needed to make for a better story.

C: To tell you a little about our book I’ll give you one of our five star reviews to say it all:

If you like suspense, mystery, intrigue, and genuine romance, AFTER THE MIST is the book for you. Add the legend of the Bermuda Triangle and you get an unforgettable literary roller coaster ride of well-plotted reading enjoyment. The characters are finely drawn, especially Maggie, with her fiery personality and Luke, the heinous villain. The tension is on-going, just when you think you're about to catch your breath, the authors throw another curve. We can't wait for another book from this new literary duo.

D: After the mist is a story that has a little bit of everything to appeal to almost all readers.

7. What can readers expect in the coming months? What are you working on now?

C: My latest book is called, When the Dam Breaks, a Philological Thriller, about a cold blooded killer, add more than a touch of insanity, and you’ll know it was meant to scare the crap out of you. I just signed contracts, it releases in March. Our next book together is book two in the Mist series we hope to be finished by the end of this month.

D: We are currently working on 2 more books in the Mist series and possible a forth on Luke the Beginning.

8. What interview question have you never been asked that you’re dying to answer? Answer it.

C: What is my favorite comfort food? Answer: Dried fruit. Finally . . . I got that off my chest, Thanks.

D: Funny. My answer to her question would be ice cream. We get asked a lot of off the wall questions that we love giving off the wall answers to.

9. Where can you be found on the web? (web site, blogs, social network links)

Website: http://www.cathyandduaine.com/
Blog: http://catcobu-afterthemist.blogspot.com/
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/CathyCoburnNovelist
                 http://www.facebook.com/duaine.neill
Twitter: https://twitter.com/catcobu

Thank you so much for having us here today Linda and for all the support you’ve given us and many like us. You’re the best.

Thanks so much to both of you for an interesting and entertaining interview!

You can get your copy of After the Mist at Champagne Books.

Sunday, June 24, 2012

In the Author Spotlight - Carol McPhee


In the Author Spotlight this month, I'm very pleased to welcome multi-published award winning novelist Carol McPhee.







Welcome, Carol. Please tell us a little about yourself.
I never intended to be a writer. Growing up, I used to visualize scenes with a hero and heroine to get to sleep, never dreaming I would one day run scenes together to complete fourteen published novels. My husband and I live in Nova Scotia and I often use the locale for my setting. The province is rich in folklore and its sea bound atmosphere lends well to various plots as in A Spirited Liaison, Be Still! My Heart, Means To An End, None So Blind, and Undercover Trouble. I start my day at 4am because that’s when my stories pop into my head begging to escape.

Every author I’ve met has their own unique story of how they found their way into writing. What path led you to become an author?

I used to read romance novels and eventually became tired of reading predictable stories. I decided to try writing the kind of story I would like to read. None So Blind was my first attempt but not the first one published. Something About That Lady came later and to this day is my favorite. Jeweled Seduction was an experiment in writing older characters which I enjoyed so much I followed it up with Alaskan Magic.

What aspect of the writing process to you enjoy the most?

I enjoy writing ‘in the zone’ when the words fly from my fingers to the keyboard with little stopping to think. Mind you, that doesn’t happen as often as I would like, but it’s pure joy when it does.

What part of the process do you dread? I absolutely abhor the promotion aspect. Selling myself as an author is an abomination I’d rather not take part in. Lol.

Are you a plotter or a pantser in terms of your writing style?

I am a pantser. I love to give my characters full steam and let them run with the plot. The few times I’ve plotted out a story, they did that anyway. Once I have the setting nailed and the age of my characters decided, whatever happens is up to them. Describe your writing space. I use a small former bedroom which we now call the computer room. If I need quiet, we have a table in our sunroom that’s set up with a laptop.

Which author has most influenced or inspired you?

Deborah Hale, a Harlequin Historical writer, whom I met at a writing workshop, inspired and encouraged me to put my thoughts to paper. My husband insisted I learn the computer if I intended to write and after a couple of years of struggle I could see the benefits of it.

Of all of your published books, which one story or character is your favorite and why?

Guess I answered that one above, but the reason I like Something About That Lady so well is because it’s so suited to George Clooney, my favorite actor, playing the part of Jed.

Would you tell us a little about your latest book?

Shadowed Pursuit is a romantic suspense which involves two RCMP officers as the hero and heroine. An amnesia victim, the heroine struggles to regain her memory and must deal with the pressure of knowing her life is in danger. Dare she trust the offensive stranger who killed her attacker with his bare hands?

What can readers expect in the coming months? What are you working on now?

I’m in the final stage of finishing another manuscript and hopefully it will find a publishing home. It’s the story of a single woman approaching her fortieth birthday. She has decided it is now or never to conceive a child who will bring unconditional love to her life. How she attains this goal is far removed from her expectation and forms the main plotline.

What interview question have you never been asked that you’re dying to answer?

Whether or not I envision myself as the heroine. Lol. Answer it. No! lol.

Where can you be found on the web? (web site, blogs, social network links)

I have a website: http://carolmcphee.webs.com/

My books are sold through Wings ePress and Champagne Books
                                                                                                  

                                     
             


Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Does This Hair Color Make My Butt Look Big?




Somewhere in my mid-forties, I had an awakening. I realized I was becoming my mother. It happened innocently enough. The bathroom was steamy from the shower and I turned to dry my hair sans clothing. At a glance, I could see that certain things were distorted, and not where they used to be. Thinking it was an optical illusion caused by the cloud on the mirror, I grabbed a towel and wiped at the glass. Unfortunately, this only brought things into clearer focus. It's shocking when that first revelation hits that you are--or at least your body is--aging. It was like sliding down a muddy hillside after a hard rain and trying to gain purchase to get back to the top.

And, so, the mad scramble to hang onto my all-too-quickly fleeting youth began. Now, we all know that without the benefits of silicone, botox, and other potentially poisonous pick-me-ups, there's not much we can do to change our shifting landscape. So I seized on the one thing I could most easily control--the grey beginning to show in my hair. I tried three or four different shades of do-it-yourself hair color before settling on one that, at least to my aging eyes, looked 'natural.' And then I religiously shampooed my youth back into my hair once a month. Then once every three weeks. Then... Well, too much of a good thing might not be such a good thing afterall.

This summer as I was preparing for a vacation on Dauphin Island, I studied my hair closely. I rationalized that (a) I didn't really care much how my hair looked while vacationing on an island where I wouldn't be sunbathing anyway and didn't know a soul, and (b) the sun would only wash out the color. I decided to forego my feeble attempts to hold back the hands of time and go au naturale. Heck, in a few weeks I'd know what color my hair truly is.

Fast forward six weeks. Now I know. Let's just say I have more 'natural highlights' than my once-natural ash brown tresses. My own jury is still out on the to-color-or-not-to-color question. But I keep getting compliments from other people on my hair. The best argument for leaving it alone came when I made a recent trip to Pittsburgh and ran into a woman I'd not seen for a year or two. We chatted and she gave me a once over, starting with my hair, then said, "You've lost weight."

I haven't. My conclusion: The hair color was making my butt look big! They really should include that in the warning label.

Linda

Monday, June 11, 2012

I Used to Enjoy Air Travel


I don't fly all that often. Maybe two or three times a year at most. This past weekend, I had to fly to Pittsburgh for a couple of meetings. I booked (well in advance) the only direct flight I could find between Memphis and Pittsburgh--departing at 2:20 p.m. and arriving in Pittsburgh at 5:28 p.m. I arrived at the Memphis airport at 12:30--well in advance of my flight. I had already checked in and printed my boarding pass. I was good to go. As the boarding time approached, more and more people gathered in the boarding area. It was a perfect day for flying with sunny skies in both Memphis and Pittsburgh. No rough weather along the way.

It must have been about 1:15 when I noticed some of my fellow travelers gathering around the check-in desk. And they didn't look very happy. I got up and dragged my small suitcase and computer bag behind me to join them at the desk. Then I looked up at the departure screen. My flight was no longer listed. Whoosh--gone. Evaporated.

We were told the flight was canceled--no further explanation given. It was a full flight so you can imagine the chaos. We were instructed to follow one of the attendants to the far end of the corridor for rebooking. I expected them to make us line up, two by two, and hold hands like we did in kindergarten. So seventy-five people fall into line behind our leader and drag our luggage (because who checks a bag anymore at $25 a pop?) down the crowded corridor, swimming upstream against travelers heading toward their departure gates. I wanted to warn them, "Check the board. My flight just disappeared." But I can't walk and chew gum at the same time and, if I lost my place in line and get separated from my group, I might never get to Pittsburgh.

We were led to a bank of scanners and instructed to sweep our boarding pass under the magic light and we would be rebooked. Uh, excuse me? Wait. I have no way of discussing the options for my rebooking? No, I'm told. The machine rebooks you automatically on the next available flight which--I am also told--might be in half an hour or tomorrow. What?!

And so the seventy-five of us (at this point probably seventy, because I'm sure we've lost a few people along the way) are herded to the machine that spits out a new ticket that we then have to take to whichever gate we are assigned and "be sure to check in so your seat isn't given away." What?!!

I am then rebooked onto a flight departing at 4:10 for Atlanta. But I paid for a direct flight to Pittsburgh. And I hate the Atlanta airport. Not the people--they're wonderful. Just the airport. And I am now going to be stuck there from 6:22 p.m. until 10:52 p.m. And, no, they don't offer free wifi (unless you want to log on to see what you can do in Atlanta.) I guess they offer this because a lot of travelers find themselves with hours of free time on their hands in the Atlanta airport. But they don't offer a free shuttle or tour bus, so...

Giving up the notion that I have ANY control in this matter, I settle at my gate and await my 4:10 flight after notifying my friend in Pittsburgh that she would have to have dinner without me--and would probably want to take a nap. We board this flight almost on time. We back away from the gate--about fifteen feet. Then the captain welcomes us with "good news and bad news." The good news--the weather all the way to Atlanta is beautiful. The bad news--flights are backed up in Atlanta and we've been instructed to shut down the engines and sit for half an hour. Ah, but it's all good because, technically, the flight left on time. And the machine that rebooked me clearly got confused because it was in row 1--First Class. Woohoo.

By the time I reached Atlanta, I had talked myself into taking this all in stride and enjoying a nice dinner. And I did. I found a little French bakery/sandwich shop back in a not-so-crowded corner and had a quiet dinner. Then I re-entered the fray to sit across from my gate and wait. While I waited, I observed a man making several trips in and out of a bar across the corridor. With each exit, he became louder and more unsteady on his feet. When it was finally time to board my 10:52 flight--at 11:05 (of course), he lined up to get on the plane. After the gate attendant had a brief conversation during which he, the pilot, co-pilot and two flight attendants all stared pointedly at the man, it was apparently determined safe to let him board the flight. I didn't think this was a prudent decision and could only hope we didn't end up making an emergency landing in Paducah because a passenger was out of control.

I give the flight attendants credit. I overheard their onboard discussion before we took off about notifying the gentleman he would not be served any alcohol on the flight. He was seated somewhere in the back and, since I didn't hear a complaint or scuffle, assume he took the news well. That, or he was already passed out. Now, for the First Class seating. I've always wanted to fly First Class. Just once. I think it's probably a different experience, however, on a plane that's a little bigger than a breadbox. Yes, I had a nice leather seat and more leg room (probably because of being in row 1). Yes, I got my choice of snacks from a basket the attendant brought around instead of just a miniscule bag of peanuts. Yes, the Coke I requested was served in a real glass instead of plastic. (People pay more money for this?) It made me wonder, though. Shouldn't these perks be offered to the folks in coach? I mean, if you can afford a First Class ticket, you can probably afford a bag of chips. It's the poor schmucks in coach that are counting their pennies to purchase Cheetos. I still hope someday I get to fly First Class, though.

When I finally reached my destination, I was too tired to do anything but crawl into bed. The following morning I logged into my friend's computer (couldn't get on her wifi) to check my email. I had two notices from the airline from the previous day at 1:00 p.m. telling me my flight was canceled and I was rebooked. Really? You know, not all of us have iphones and check email on our phones. I did give the airline my phone number.

On Saturday, I went back in to check my email only to find a message from the airline--asking me to complete a survey evaluating my experience with my canceled and rebooked flight. Well, now you're talking. After completing each question with a number rating (a low number rating), I had a little box asking for comments. Believe me, the comments flew faster than I had.

I used to love to fly. Now I have to walk barefoot into a body scanner so some stranger can see all the nasty hidden truths beneath my slightly oversized shirt, then grab my stuff and tiptoe to a bench to put my shoes back on and return my laptop to its case. But not before I had to wait for a female security office to check my watch for explosives. She should have checked me further. I was about ready to explode. Especially after being rebooked.

I think if the airlines want to make all of this worth my time, they could at least offer a few other perks--maybe a free mammogram for those of us who are due. How hard could it be to add that to their equipment? I'm already half undressed.

Linda